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Thanks to Free!

I've been trying my best to lay down the first chapter in this book, They Always Come Back, but a sista needs some "now" money, so I've been searching the web for freelance jobs and low and behold, my fellow blogger friend Free has some resources that were "write" on time!!! Gosh, it's always great to find a fellow writer!!! ;-)

posted by Soulfull @ 10:54 PM , links to this post

Now Wait A Minute...Hold On...

The Boondocks cast. Clockwise from top: Huey Freeman, Michael Caesar, Hiro Otomo, Riley Freeman, Cindy McPhearson, and Jazmine DuBoisWhile reading my weekly Black Issues Book Review email, I just had to drop my two pennies in the debate over the necessity of the Cartoon Networks show, The Boondocks. The latest controversy is the Boondocks nomination at the NAACP Image Awards which I find absolutely warranted. I like the show. In fact, my husband and I make it a point to DVR every episode so we can watch it on Monday, if we happen to miss it at 11pm Sunday night. Aaron developed a comic strip that has always been a topic of interest since its creation in 1997 until its syndication in 1999. Now everyone is harping on the TV show. Just my opinion, but I feel as though we as black people can't just poke fun at ourselves. Every one is not socially conscience no matter how much we might want them to be and despite the stink some want to create over what they call the over usage of the word nigga, this show is a part of our social fabric. Nigga is a very strong word with many meanings, but just like the white man used it against us to further our self-hatred; we turned around, picked ourselves up, mended our wounds, and moved the hell on because nigga didn’t define us then and it doesn’t now! The Boondocks has a message in every single cartoon and these messages are needed. I say take what applies to you, if it doesn't apply then ignore it, and there’s always the option of turning it off and reading a book (preferably mine when it comes out!). For instance, the King episode was important! There was more to that show than King saying "you niggas"! I would have liked for Rev. Al Sharpton to have taken the position of examining how to uplift the issues that the Boondocks’ "King" brought up. Shoot, bring them to the forefront of the media’s attention. Those are the issues that needed the spotlight! I’d rather have shows that spark debates about our culture than to have nothing. I mean really, how many shows do we have on TV? It's no wonder we can't have anything funny on TV as everything has to be overanalyzed to an unfair degree. Why is this protesting necessary? I just don't understand. I commend the NAACP for recognizing the value of The Boondocks, no matter the controversies. I mean, do you see the Jewish people protesting Seinfeld’s or Stiller’s craziness? It's COMEDY! We need better causes to fight because the N-word is not one. It's not going to go away and not saying it on TV isn't going to make it disappear either. Shit, let's worry about the homeless, corrupt politicians, or the LACK of shows on the MAJOR networks depicting the black experience… Now those are some worthy causes.... Let’s not tear down what we’ve barely built up. We have so little on TV as it is…

posted by Soulfull @ 8:35 AM ,

Just A Sex Story

Curled up next to her laptop, Jennifer awaits the right words to help compose this letter to Jim, to convey to him how much she needs him at this very moment. Yet, nothing comes, but the mystic thoughts of their last time together. It was hot. She was surprised and he... He was thorough. He took his time with her. Made every second feel like... well, like an hour. Ha! She couldn't even believe she let him do what he wanted, any way he wanted it, but it was cool. He understood her needs and she wanted to be his freak. Damn, the two of us go so well together. The lovemakin, no scratch that, sexin of yesterday was just, un...real! Okay, Jen focus! Get back to the letter. How was she going to tell him that she didn't want to be his girlfriend, but instead his friend with "benefits"? I mean, what guy in love with his woman would accept that? Probably none. Still, she forged ahead with her letter...

Dear Jim,

Wow, I can't believe it's been a whole year. Seems like time ran away from us the day you kissed me in the parking lot. I couldn't let go from you then. You've had me so caught up with your letters, poems, and gifts, that I couldn't stand a moment to go by withought hearing from you. But Jim, I have to let go now, I mean, it's just not working. Your hours at the plant are just too long and I have so many responsibilities at the school. Geez, why can't this be easier, but love never is right? Isn't that what you always told me? Damn, Jim, I just... I just wanna be your friend. We can't do this anymore. I can't date you exclusively only to be left alone night after night playing with myself. My drive is too high for that. I want to date Jim. I want to see other people. Now before you call me a bitch and rip this letter to shreds, hear me out. Saturday's love session was a wake up call for me. It made me realize just how much I needed to be free again, to love not just you but myself. So can't we just be lovers Jim? Can't we enjoy what is so natural for our bodies to do? Sometimes two people have a connection that goes beyond love, but straight to their loins. Okay that was corny, but do you know what I mean Jim? As you read this, can't you feel the lust vibrating off the page? Even though your mad, you know it's there and I'm not going to deny it! I'm not going to be like these young girls and sell you out because we can't be in a "relationship". No, I'm still going to give you all of me, well, maybe parts of me, but none the less, it's all true. I'm an honest chick Jim and I hope you can respect what I've said and even if you don't want the benefits, I'll always be your friend.


He isn't going to like this. I can just hear him now, cursing me out. Yet, I find it necessary to be honest. I don't want your love, I want your package and there is NOTHING wrong with that. I'm 32, single, mature, and at my prime. I don't want to marry and I don't want kids. I just wanna live life fresh, taking in every moment like it's my last. Leaving behind nothing but trails of wet dreams to be savored in my afterlife. I can't wait to see him tomorrow...

(c) 2006 Soulfull. All rights reserved.

This story just came to me, while I was writing something else....Your thoughts?

posted by Soulfull @ 12:18 AM , links to this post

Comedic Actor Don Knotts Dies at 81

Headline Reads: Comedic Actor Don Knotts Dies at 81

Knotts, who played Mr. Furley, along with John Ritter were the two reasons why I used to watch Three's Company. God Bless them both. They're probably in heaven right now crackin jokes on one another! :-)

posted by Soulfull @ 7:37 PM , links to this post

I Wanted A Funny...

And I got one from the Best Funny Pics blog! Definitely worth a visit!

posted by Soulfull @ 6:47 PM , links to this post

Time to Purge

Okay, I'm trippin out again aka another anxiety moment! I have so much going on in my life right now, I think I'm gonna puke. Friday started off really normal, nothing crazy. Made plans to go see the Tyler Perry movie and to do some work on my books. Until, I got this email that sent me in a spiral. About 2 weeks ago, I decided to get my "camera-lovin" son into modeling and the first casting call I entered him in resulted with him being accepted as a finalist. Now, I'm jumpin with joy from the excitement of possibly going on a free trip to Jamaica, yet I'm full of nerves for him and me. Next month we're scheduled to head to Brooklyn to meet the photographer, which is the same day I have my marketing class!! So just to be on the safe side, I went out and bought a laptop (overzealous, I know) from Best Buy that I've been wanting for the LONGEST time. I figure it's time to just get it over with and fork over the dough. Okay, but it doesn't stop there! On Thursday, I FINALLY got over my foolish fears and went to an appt with my doctor to discuss my plastic surgery. I was born with a cleft lip/palate and I've been scheduled to have a final reconstructive surgery since I was in my late teens. However, life took over. I got married, had kids, became a workaholic, and didn't think twice about it until now, thanks to the fact that I took the wrong route with putting braces on my teeth, instead of just going under the knife. Now, these shits are driving me literally nuts!!! They have to come off! SO there I was spilling my guts to my doc, who calmed me down and gave me a referral to an ENT to began the process of surgery (along with phone numbers to a shrink, although I told her I'M NOT CRAZY, just scatterbrained). Needless to say, I haven't called the Ear, Nose, and Throat doc yet, because of this possible photo shoot, just starting a new term in school, and whatever dumb ass excuse I let my mind makeup. Like my mom says, God made you this way, you have a normal life, why the surgery now? Good question. Maybe because it's impacting my speech, which only fosters more insecurity about myself, and did I mention the pain from the braces that forces me to wear dental wax all damn day! Fuck that! It's time. I'm over the fear of dying on the table. I'm over the fear of how people will take me once I've gone through with it. I always be the same person inside, so what the hell does it matter. It's not like I'm getting double-F breast implants or something... It's just a nose job, and 2 veneers. So despite what my mom thinks, I can't be afraid anymore. I won't be afraid anymore. Not of change, be it external or internal. It's time. It's just fucking purge... Whew, I feel a couple pounds lighter already... LOL! :-)

posted by Soulfull @ 3:20 PM , links to this post

Please Hammer Don't Blog Em

Just discovered MC Hammer has a blog. You got to admit this man had a HUGE impact on Rap/Hip-Hop...Much Love Hammer...

posted by Soulfull @ 3:09 PM , links to this post


I hate to hear pain. I hate the thought of senseless death, and I damn sure hate to see it ignored! I joined The One Campaign and since then they've made it a point to keep everyone abreast of all the issues affecting our poorest countries. The following is an email they recently sent. If you care, sign up!!

Right now, the leaders of the House and Senate Budget Committees, are some of the most important people in Washington. Senators Judd and Conrad and Congressmen Nussle and Spratt chair the Budget Committees, and they ultimately decide how much life-saving assistance the U.S. will give to the world's poorest countries -- and they need to hear from YOU!

Because of your efforts, America made promises in 2005 to fight AIDS and extreme poverty. Today, hundreds of thousands of people around the world are alive because of America's historic commitment to fight AIDS. Thank you!

By working together as ONE , we can do even more.

posted by Soulfull @ 9:49 PM , links to this post

Smile Fo Me Daddy...

TV Jewelry Inc. © Copyright 2005 All Rights ReservedOkay, so Nelly had to let everyone know about the "Grillz" and not that I am a big fan of the song, although it is quite catchy, or all the grillz running around the fella's teeth these days, I found it interesting to see the price tags on some of these Now-Laters, gum drops, and jelly beans...

TV Jewelry Inc. © Copyright 2005 All Rights Reserved

Oh yeah! Many congratulations to Paul Wall and his wife Crystal, who are expecting their first child on May 1st!!!

posted by Soulfull @ 9:09 PM , links to this post

Girrrl, Let's Celebrate!

I received this lovely email in my inbox today from a beautiful sista friend of mine, I just had to share it...

What would most of us do without our sisters, confidants, and shopping, lunching, traveling girlfriends? Let's celebrate each other for each other's sake! If you get this twice or more, you are lucky to have more than one girlfriend. Be happy!

Someone will always be prettier.

Someone will always be smarter.

Someone's house will be bigger.

Someone will drive a better car.

Someone's children will do better in school.

And someone's husband will fix more things around the house.

So let it go,

and love you and your circumstances.

Think about it.

The prettiest woman in the world can have hell in her heart.

And the most highly favored
Woman on your job may be unable to have children.

And the richest woman you know,
she's got the car, the house, the clothes....might be lonely.

And the word says if "I have not Love, I am nothing."

So, again, love you.

Love who you are.

Look in the mirror in the morning and smile and say

"Winners make things happen.

Losers let things happen."

Be Blessed ladies and pass this on to encourage another woman.

"To the world you might be one person,

but to one person you just might be the world."

posted by Soulfull @ 10:29 PM , links to this post

Where Are The Brothas?

AMA Headline Reads: African-American women outnumber African-American men in college attendance:
"Overall, more women than men attend college in every racial and ethnic group. Below are the numbers of students who attended two-year and four-year colleges and graduate schools in 2004.
Total college students 17,383,000
Women 9,808,000
Men 7,575,000
Black women 1,525,000
Black men 776,000
Source: U.S. Census Bureau "

Well, school has started again (Kaplan University in case you were wondering...) and this semester I'm taking Marketing and Web Design. While doing research for the first week's discussion, I came across this story about the lack of black males in higher education. Part of me wants to believe this is untrue, yet another says, you can't argue with 2004 Census Bureau facts... Can you? My sons better get ready because they have absolutely NO choice, but to obtain a higher education!

posted by Soulfull @ 9:47 PM , links to this post

Making You Laugh... One Crank Call At A Time

While dealing with my writer's block, I've had one hell of a time listening to Comedian Roy Wood Jr.'s online prank calls! Absolutely hilarious!!!!

posted by Soulfull @ 1:27 PM , links to this post

Oh Shit...A Panic Attack

I'm paralyzed by my own creativity. I wander around sometimes in different arenas doing different things because I feel differently dumb. I have so much inside of me, yet I feel like it's all nothing. Right now, a line I wrote a while ago sticks out in my mind...

I'm addicted to poetry and stalked by writing.

I'm so fucking torn! Part of me wants to pen this novel and another wants me go take some artistic photos of the snow falling outside, while another wants me to go back to bed and start this moment over. Maybe it's all the late nights. I just wanna keep typing something….ANYTHING...Until this feeling goes away, but I think I hear a poem coming...

My letter came back
Return to sender!
Now how the fuck did that
Happen. I know I
Inscribed every line right!
But the sight
Of your address,
Left my dreams
In a mess
When I gazed
Over my molested correspondence.
I will write you again,

I'm trippin....

posted by Soulfull @ 9:02 AM , links to this post

Man Accused Of Oprah Ticket Scheme

Headline Reads: Man Accused Of Oprah Ticket Scheme

I just can't believe the nastiness of people these days. Nothing is sacred, not even our most vunerable, the elderly. Reading this story on this guy, in my own backyard, who took advantage of 70 elderly women by charging them $500 a piece to see the Oprah show, just makes me sick! Where does this type of hunger come from, this hunger for money at any cost? It's just plain sad...

posted by Soulfull @ 6:21 AM , links to this post

Hurricane Katrina: A Poem

Hurricane Katrina and the first rain bands as it makes landfall in the gulf coastThinking back to Katrina gives me those god-awful feelings I had wondering if my cousins were okay and as I sit here now, it's hard knowing that they and all of those in New Orleans are STILL having a hard time making it by. I pray for my family and all those affected families often and since the events of last year, I have written a few poems on the unnecessary tragedies that came to be in New Orleans. The following is one of those poems:


I dance naked,
Surrounded by death.
I groove in between the cracks
Left by Katrina's fury.
She glides behind me,
Her winds moving my dreads.
She is still.
Egging me.
Begging me,
To dance with her.
To unravel the destruction
She did not bring alone!
She whispers in my ear,
Something wicked this way comes,
So baby girl, you best to run.
I want to curse her
Yet instead I draw closer to her
To the pulse of her
Wanting her to tell me more...

This is an ongoing poem, so it's not done... Something is telling me this is gonna be a long one... to be continued...

posted by Soulfull @ 12:12 AM , links to this post

Not In My House

To Drug Or Not To Drug - That Is The Question! Photo: (c) 2006 FoxThere was a scene in the Fox TV show, House, which aired on 2/14, were the parents admitted to Dr. House that they gave their son marijuana in order to stop him from being curious in the future about the drug. Now, as I sat there watching the DVR'ed version of this show, I immediately paused it and engaged my husband on whether or not this would be a suitable avenue to pursue with our two sons. Surprisingly, he seems to think YES, while I am still undecided. Although it's rather enticing to squelch the allure of drugs by giving them to your children, I somehow feel that I could contribute to a future addiction by doing this. So fellow bloggers with or without kids, would you allow this in your house?

posted by Soulfull @ 9:47 PM , links to this post

Have You Ever Experienced The Punany...

The Punany Poets that is...

I'm psyched! GGB loved the article, just as much as I loved the show! And Boy O Boy, what a show that was! What can I tell you guys that I haven't already written in my review, except that I am still thinking about that show! And interestingly enough, you would be too if you had seen it...LOL! For all you folks in NY, you're in luck! If you are interested in sampling The Punany for yourself, they will be filming a special show at THE SANFORD MEISNER THEATER for your viewing pleasure....

Location: 164 Eleventh Avenue
(Between 22nd and 23rd)
New York, NY 10011
(212) 206-1764 phone
(212) 206-1765 fax
Closest Subway: C, E to 23rd Street
or M23 Bus to 23rd and 11th
Date: Sunday, February 19th
Time: 7pm

Are You Up For The Challenge? Do you dare step inside the world of The Punany Poets??? Well if you do, let a sista know about it! I would love to hear about the experience and other experiences from those who have witnessed a show!

posted by Soulfull @ 1:16 AM , links to this post

I'm Slowly Dying

While watching Leapfrog videos with my sons, this poem followed me onto the sofa and dared me to put it down on paper...

Death Sentences

Words incarcerate me,
To a life of punctuation marks across my flesh.
This period without love has me questioning.
These exclamations of tears,
Left indented on my cheeks,
By the tongue of lust.

Whew! That was hard. It’s not easy for me to let go of these children I create, but I feel such a release to birth my poems. I've written so many through the years, yet I'm still very shy when it comes to sharing. The curse of an artist, I suppose... Hopefully, with time (and this blog) I can dead the shyness inside of me!

"God is too good for us to have fear, yo!" - Floetry
Hey, I wonder how their concert is going tonight at Constitution Hall... Sorry I missed it ladies!

posted by Soulfull @ 9:14 PM , links to this post

Following My Bliss

Taking a page out of a fellow blogger's blog, I am sending an email to the Comptroller to express my thoughts on his lack of self-control. The following is my short, but direct letter:

Sent: Thursday, February 16, 2006 3:03 PM
Subject: True Leadership

Afternoon Comptroller,

I am writing to you to express my feelings on your comments towards a female aide, which were quoted in the article, MD Official Offends with Comments on Female Aide, of today's Metro section of The Washington Post.

What you did was disrespectful and I can't seem to wrap my mind around why you feel the need to downplay your behavior. Your actions are not characteristics of a "true leader of the people”. Regardless of sex, another human being should not be made to feel intimidated or embarrassed in a place of business, let alone a governmental office. As parents we teach our children to respect others and abide by the unspoken rules of common courtesy, yet in our own state offices we have "leaders" who can not seem to follow these very basics. You are not just "William Donald Schaefer" when you step into your position as a Comptroller for our great state of Maryland, you are a role model. Today, I feel a great sadness for those of us who have supported all your past terms. You have let us down.


A Former Supporter

posted by Soulfull @ 2:40 PM , links to this post


Headline Reads: Md. Official Offends With Comments on Female Aide

What the hell is Comptroller William Donald Schaefer thinking? Never mind, I got an idea of what he is thinking about and WHAT he is thinking with, but how dumb can you be? And to rebuttal with something as defiant as "I [looked] at one of the girls as she walked out. Big deal. . . . The day I don't look at pretty girls, I die," is just plain CRAZY! At 84 years old, I think it's time to hang it up. NEWS FLASH Schaefer: Stop looking! No woman in her right mind would touch you and it's just plain SICK that you would take advantage of your position to "ask" that woman to walk again in front of you.

Additionally, some want to downplay this woman's right to be disgusted and upset. To them I ask, what if this was your daughter? Would you want her to work around such creeps? Granted, there are more important issues in the world right now than who Schaefer is flirting with, yet I still feel his actions have no place in "a state Board of Public Works meeting with more than 100 people in attendance". How rude!

posted by Soulfull @ 2:05 PM , links to this post

It's Oh So Hard...

What was that old Coca-Cola slogan....oh yeah... The Real Thing. Yeah, I think that was it. Well at this late in the day, I feel as though my words are creeping back under my pillow to fall asleep, leaving me to wallow in potential musings. I need the real thing. I need a coke! With nothing to drink, but wine and coffee (what a combo!), my writing ability is being affected. Too late to go to the store, but this feeling of inbetweenness (is that even a word!) is driving me insane. Like Big Pun said...It's So Hard... Yes it is hard to believe in a world full of naysayers. I asked my husband today, when is it time to give up? When do you know when to throw it in, close up shop, and say this is too hard? My mom always tells me that yes God wants you to have faith, but he also gives you common sense. Well, God, is this the point where I am supposed to use my common sense and relinquish the reigns on my hopes? I think not. I'm just going through a dry spell. Writing this story on The Punany Poets (think back to HBO's Real Sex), has me feenin for a carbonated beverage!!! I can just hear the crack of the can. The cold, yet bitter taste of cola as it drowns the back of my throat. I think I'm going over to join my words in the bed… One Love…

posted by Soulfull @ 11:09 PM , links to this post


Headline reads: Cheney Shoots Fellow Hunter in Texas Accident

Now you know something is incrediable wrong with this picture. As the old saying goes, if you can't stand the heat, stay out of the Texas ranch. LOL! Seriously, I don't know what to make of this story, but I must say it's no doubt embrassing for the VP, right up there with leading us all in believing there are WMDs...

posted by Soulfull @ 3:08 PM , links to this post

Swing Low Sweet Chariot

It's been about 2 weeks since my last post. I had to step away from the keyboard for a while... All because of Coretta. Ever since I watched the funeral, I've been even more determined to get out my dreams. As Ms. Shabazz put it at the end of her remarks, by any means necessary. That's how I'm living this life God has given me. I've been working long hours, getting up early, going to bed late, just to have my soulful synergy. The business is just starting yet, I still feel I've got to do more, be more. Like it wasn't enough to just have a dream, it has to become your life. Breathing in you, within you, like a fetus tucked deep into a woman's womb, my dream is feeding off of me. I can't let it die. My dreams feel like those dreams of the late Kings. I can just imagine the two of them holding eachother close, looking down on this world recognizing how much better it is now than it was before they arrived. Yet, more work has to be done. I admire the King children, Yolanda and Dexter for wanting to sell the King center to the National Park Service to allow the family to focus on social change. What a good idea as I find it only fitting that the dream continues and who better to lead it then their children. Yet, they can't go at it alone. We all need to do it. It starts with simple kindness, a loving nature, or if I may say it in a more up-to-date way: NO HATERATION! On the same note, ironically my mother found a poem of mine from 96 that I wrote about King. She liked it so much that she sent it to then President Clinton. It was truly a surprise to see a letter AND photo come back from him, acknowledging my work... I'd like to share it now in all it's 10 year old glory. God bless the KINGS...

What Happened To The Dream?

What happened to the dream?
The dream that one day there would be no violence placed against any race,
Yet, brutality plagues every man, woman, and child of every culture.
Did we not learn from the mistakes of our past?

What happened to the dream?
The dream that education would be for everyone,
Yet, today education is being abused and misused.
Have we forgotten the years when we couldn't merely sit in a classroom or
Read a book?

What happened to the dream?
The one where we would love even if we didn't receive love in return,
Yet now in days, love is a foreign word and maliciousness is all too familiar.
Hasn't malice been the primary reason we fought for our rights or
Marched On Washington?

What happened to the dream?
The dream that racism and equality would overshadow all hatred,
Nevertheless people still think a color determines our personality.
Did Martin Luther King's words "not by the color of our skin, but
The content of our character" go unheard?

What happened to the dream?
Did it fade away?
Like the dazzling sun vanishing over the mountains,
Has it disappeared from sight and mind?
Have the years of sweat, blood, and tears been meaningless?
Or because King died, the dream should die with him?
The dream wasn't solely his, but it was ours.
It's time to take our dream and preach it to the new generation, as well as
Lead it to new glorious heights, but HOWEVER I still have to cry out,

(c) 1996

posted by Soulfull @ 2:15 PM , links to this post

Want A Free Book?

Bruce Judson's Go It Alone! The Secret to Building A Successful Business on Your Own

In a first-of-its-kind initiative, HarperCollins Publishers has made the full content of Go It Alone! available free for readers at this Web site. You can access the life-changing ideas in this book, at no cost, by clicking here.

posted by Soulfull @ 3:36 PM , links to this post